Love or Fear

Yesterday, a friend on Facebook asked everyone what they think love is.  I did not respond because someone else had already given my short answer that would have been posted there.  Love is self-sacrifice.

But there is so much more to it than just saying the word.  One must understand what self-sacrifice really means in everyday life.  There are good examples of self-sacrifice that might give us a hint of its meaning, but even they cannot provide a full explanation.  Jesus is the ultimate example of self-sacrifice.  He "made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men:  And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross." (Phil. 2:7-8 KJV)  Christ figures in literature often appear through individual self-sacrifice as well.  Sidney Carton in Dickens' A Tale of Two Cities sacrificed himself and his dreams for Lucie Manette and Charles Darnay because he thought her welfare more than his own life (Eph. 5:25).  Sonya, from Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment, is a dual example of self-sacrifice both for the sake of her family and later for the sake of Rodya.  A more obscure example of self-sacrifice comes from The Winning of Barbara Worth, by Harold Bell Wright.  Abe Lee sacrifices his own lifelong dream for the good of Barbara Worth.

If I'm not mistaken, those ideas show just enough of what love requires to put the fear into you.  Although there is an intense longing within people to be able to love like that, it is often subdued by fear.  Therefore, it is necessary also to know the opposite of love.  It would seem that there is an obvious answer:  hate.  But that is false.  I never quite understood the one thing that is truly antagonistic to love before seeing the MessyMondays video, "The Opposite of Love."

But "perfect love casteth out fear." (I John 4:8)  And what are those fears that love casts out?

• fear of being hurt?
• fear of another not loving you back?
• fear of humiliation?
• fear of loneliness?
• fear of rejection?
• fear of abandonment?
• fear of being bested?
• fear of not being good enough?
• fear of being too much?  (too talkative--too quiet--too ugly)

Do you all realize that those fears focus entirely on oneself?  I only just did as I was beginning to write this post!  The one thing that stands in the way of our loving others as Christ loves us is that we think about our own selves and fear for our own selves.  But his focus was not on himself.  He looked down and saw our need of him and took no further thought for himself.  This is the true meaning of self-sacrifice.  It is a way of life as well as a noble cause of death (Rom. 12:1-3).  Heed the high calling God has given you.

A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;

as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples,

if ye have love one to another. (John 13:34-35)